You guys have been working SO HARD this year. So, this week, I am not going to assign you any new work. But there are two things that I need you to work on for just a little bit when you get time.
- I need you to email me your FINAL DRAFTS of your Myth/Epic Essay. This will be seen by other students so if you want to look at your graded paper copy that I passed back and make a couple quick spelling or punctuation fixes go ahead, but I will need this ASAP! Try to get it to me by Monday night, if not it is okay to give it to me by Wednesday.
- I would like you to continue working on your Autobiographical Essays. You have finished your first rough draft at this point-bravo! I have read them and if you scroll down to the bottom, I have given each of you some feedback. Remember, I want you to write about how this incident affected or developed your faith in this essay. However you want to do it is fine with me, but I will be looking for that.
- Now, you need to go back through your essay and add sensory details, imagery, and powerful words (diction).
- Use your handouts that I gave you back when you were writing your myths to help establish your setting, characterization, and theme of your autobiographical essay.
- You might want to make a plot diagram to show your introduction, rising action, climax, falling action, and conclusion. This isn’t mandatory, I just want you to see how your story should progress.
So this week you can turn your first rough draft into your nice looking, upgraded, supersized, deluxe, select, designer 2nd rough draft.
You have been working so hard. I wanted to give you a break this week. You deserve it.
Your final draft will be due next Friday, December 4.
Comments on your Rough Drafts-
Nait- Good start. You poor thing! I would just continue working on editing, and word choice. Also go through it and make sure you are transitioning between the paragraphs.
Abigail-Good start. Because it was handwritten I couldn’t really tell where the paragraphs ended and began. But the story was great. I am going to have Emma read that because she has some of her friends trying to get her into things that are worldly. This will minister to her. Keep working on it!
Divina-Wow, that was heavy and honest. I would add a bit more to the conclusion. I wanted especially to hear more about HOW your heart was changed, was there a verse? a study? a song? How did the Lord woo you back? Let us see what He did. Your testimony is about you, but it also so much about Him. ❤
Donica-You picked a heavy topic, this is beautiful. I want you to not be afraid to describe it though. You need to let yourself say more about this. So in your second draft add more details of the experience. Also, you mention how at the time it felt like God did’t care. That is such a rich and honest statement. How did that change? Did it? Did this experience altar your faith? Did it deepen it? It is okay to tell the truth.
Macey-Great story, it is tense and detailed. But I want you to work on the conclusion. You tell me what happened, but you don’t develop the meaning. What did you learn? Why is this disappointment so significant. And also, mention something about the Lord in this. What does this tell you about your faith, or a verse of encouragement. Does that make sense?
Mitchell-I enjoyed reading your background. But your essay is a general overview of your life. I want you to get more specific. Narrow it down. Pick an incident in your life that was significant to you. I can tell you enjoy sports, was there one game or event in particular that was significant to you? Tell me a story!
Joshua–What an intense story! Also, you have a great introduction. I would ask you to look at the structure of the essay, right now it is written out as two large paragraphs. Break up the moments into paragraphs. Also, develop the conclusion. You may want to add a Bible verse that shows that God was watching out for her. 🙂
Tristan–Good start. I want you to go back though and work on the organization. You have written it as one big paragraph. Of course it is a rough draft, but go back and break it up into paragraphs at the natural transitions. You also have some comma splices, and places where you should have used a semi-colon instead of a comma. I also appreciate your honesty, but I want to hear more of why you changed. You mention that there were influences–was it verses? teachings? songs? better friends? your parents? Be specific. When did you open your eyes? Spend some more time developing this aspect of your testimony. This is where God breaks through, let Him have some glory 🙂
I think I am missing one from Antoine, Santiago, Matthew, Elisabeth, and Christahn. I might have them, but I just don’t see them. So please let me know if you turned it in so I can give you credit, and feedback. Or if you haven’t turned it in yet, get on it 🙂